the razor's edge

One of my favorite books is The Razor's Edge.  I received it as a gift, when I graduated from high school. Since then, I've probably read it 4 or 5 times. In fact, it might be the only book I've picked up more than once. Each time I read it, I'm at a different point in my life, and it means something different to me. It is an incredible book and story...and impossible not to relate to. I came across this quote last night... the concept of change is at the heart of the book, which I think is why I love it so much.

"Nothing in the world is permanent, and we're foolish when we ask anything to last, but surely we're still more foolish not to take delight in it while we have it. If change is of the essence of existence one would have thought it only sensible to make it the premise of our philosophy."   ...Somerset Maugham

My dad told me one time that change was the only certain thing in life (he continued to tell me throughout my childhood that "life is not fair" - which as far as I am concerned, is another certainty in life)...

black sheep

one of my good friends made me the most incredible mix cd, which has been playing on a loop since he gave it to me monday... Martin Sexton sings Black Sheep in track 4. it's giving skinny love a rival. i love it. 

happy thursday to you...

grace

The Labyrinth above can be found on the floor of the Grace Cathedral in San Francisco. I wandered in there one day when I was exploring the hilly city... The labyrinth  is an ancient pattern that can be found in may forms in different cultures around the world. They are open to all people as non-denominational, cross-cultural tools for well-being. It can be used in many ways: to quite the mind, find balance, encourage meditation and insight, or for celebration. (makes me want one in my house!)...

from my #1

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”

... Ralph Waldo Emerson 

just because

moon beam

My Grandfather, who I call Pop-Pop, but who others call Moon... just sent me the sweetest Valentine's e-card (he's tech savy...it's incredible) ... and these...

They're written by Andy Rooney , a man who has the gift of saying so much with so few words. Enjoy.......

I've learned.... That the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

I've learned.... That when you're in love, it shows.

I've learned.... That just one person saying to me, 'You've made my day!' makes my day.

I've learned.... That having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right.

I've learned.... That you should never say no to a gift from a child.

I've learned.... That I can always pray for someone when I don't have the strength to help him in some other way.

I've learned .... That no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

I've learned.... That sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

I've learned.... That simple walks with my father around the block on summer nights when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

I've learned.... That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned.... That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.

I've learned.... That money doesn't buy class.

I've learned.... That it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I've learned... That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I've learned.... That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I 've learned.... That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I've learned.... That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I've learned.... That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I've learned... That everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

I've learned..... That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

I've learned... That life is tough, but I'm tougher.

I've learned.... That opportunities are never lost, someone will take the ones you miss.

I've learned.... That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

I've learned.... That I wish I could have told my Mom that I love her one more time before she passed away.

I've learned.... That one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I've learned.... That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

I've learned.... That when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.

I've learned.... That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you're climbing it.

I've learned.... That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

reminder

sometimes you just need a little boost...a little reminder...

so this is mine for you...

oh, yeah, and happy wednesday. it is gorgeous out ....................

more unsolicited advice

More words to live by...

• The Lotus Touts

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR. When you say, 'I love you,' mean it.

FIVE. When you say, 'I'm sorry,' look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dreams. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN.. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN! ... When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, 'Why do you want to know?'

FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN. Say 'bless you' when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson.

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY- ONE. Spend some time alone.

morning linds!

Well GOOOOOOD MORNING!!!!

My best friend [lindsay] is getting her MBA in an executive program at William and Mary. We're all proud of her... I'm also proud of her new professional id picture (i had to jump through hoops to commandeer said picture)... hehe

side note: I wonder if she feels like she is back in second grade...sitting for her yearbook photo. Hmmmm...

what's so funny?

Why Are We Ticklish?
By: Vicki Santillano

For all the laughter it produces, sometimes being ticklish is just annoying. It has prevented me from truly enjoying pedicures and far too many back massage attempts have ended with me in a fit of giggles. Try as I might to fight it and take the focus off my jumpy nerve endings, the slightest brush against a certain spot is enough to make me squirm and laugh uncontrollably. 

Why are we ticklish in the first place? 

Is it an inherited trait passed down from our ancestors or is it a learned social act? And why is it that we laugh, despite our discomfort? 

A Physiological and Social Phenomenon

When it comes to the question of why certain parts of our bodies—feet, chest, lower backs, underarms, etc.—are more sensitive than others, some believe that it’s an evolutionary trait we’ve developed to protect ourselves from small bugs, spiders, and other surprise attackers. The key word here is surprise—the grazing touch usually needs to come unexpectedly to yield laughter. Research has shown that the cerebellum, which registers touch, shows more activity when the touch is a surprise rather than anticipated. If the brain recognizes that the touch is coming, it will make the nerve response less intense, which is why we can’t tickle ourselves successfully. 

Why we laugh when tickled is possibly where social cues come into play. Tickling that produces laughter is referred to as gargalesis, a term coined by two psychologists, Arthur Allin and G. Stanley Hall. (They differentiate this type of tickling from knismesis, which is akin to a light itch.) Gargalesis usually only occurs when the tickler and the tickler’s “victim” are familiar and comfortable with each other. A child being tickled by his or her parent, or a person being tickled by a partner or close friend, will often attempt to escape the attack, but will laugh when doing so. However, imagine if a random person on the street or even someone you just met tried to tickle you. The response would probably not be laughter—in fact, it would be downright awkward and creepy. That’s because we learn from a young age that it’s only socially acceptable for those we trust to have that kind of contact with us. 

What’s so Funny?

Charles Darwin believed that tickling was the key to creating social bonds between people, such as mother and child or between romantic partners. He saw it as social play, a positive and safe way to stimulate each other. But is tickling actually pleasurable? Even though we laugh along when the right person performs the act, tickling is not often enjoyed. The discomfort makes us wiggle away from the person, yet our laughing encourages the tickler to continue. In one study that examined the physical response to tickling, 70 to 75 percent of participants laughed when stimulated, but most stated afterward that they generally did not enjoy being tickled. If that’s the case, where does the laughter come from? 

Theories about the origins of tickling-induced laughter abound. One psychiatrist, Donald W. Black, found that the places on our bodies most prone to feeling ticklish relate to our reflexes, implying a connection between the playful fighting back that occurs during tickle fests and acquiring necessary self-defense skills. According to him, laughing reinforces the act as a safe, non-harmful way of learning how to protect oneself. There are also some personality theorists who postulate that laughing, and even the degree to which we are ticklish, is based on how anxious or jumpy we are as people. They believe that those who are more prone to anxiety tend to have the most uncontrolled reactions to tickling, and that even the anticipation alone can set them off. 

However, one study conducted at the University of San Diego challenged these social hypotheses. Researchers created a tickle machine to test whether participants would have the same reaction to a non-human tickling sensation, and many ended up having similar responses—laughing, twitching uncontrollably—to those tickled by another person. Another study also found that rats similarly laugh when tickled, implying that the laughter might be reflexive, at least initially, rather than socially learned. 

Our common response to tickling may start out as a physiological reaction to perceived threats, but there is no doubt that it serves a social function as we get older. Despite the fact that tickling makes us cringe, it has a playful connotation. However, anyone who has suffered a merciless tickle attack at the hands of an older sibling knows that it isn’t always about being playful—sometimes it’s just a way to get under someone’s skin. Other times it happens without intention, like during a routine pedicure. 

Regardless of the role tickling plays in our lives, whether it protects us or brings us closer to others, we can always count on it as a sure source of laughter—even if we’re not sure why.